Interpreting the signs
Interpreting the signs
A question I get often is, "How do I know which path to take?" This can be in relation to a marriage prospect, a career, a business venture, or any other potentially life-altering course.
As spiritual beings, we believe in signs. As Muslims, particularly when we pray istikhara (the prayer for guidance), we believe that we will be guided to the path we are meant to be on, the one that is best for us.
Spiritual signs are real, and Allah guides us through different channels. Yet, the way we interpret signs can also be a reflection of ourselves and our desires. When we want something, we may focus on all the signs that seem to be telling us to take this road, and we minimize or ignore the red flags. We tell ourselves, and sincerely believe, that Allah wants this for us, and so we persist. Similarly, if we are insecure in ourselves, even if we truly want something and there are many positive things in it, we may amplify the obstacles and jump ship. Obviously, Allah did not want this for us, otherwise, why all the hurdles?
There is nothing necessarily wrong with thinking in this way. Believing Allah wants something for us can give us the determination we need to push through. Believing Allah does not want a particular matter for us can make us content with things not working out.
However, at times, this thinking may hinder us from taking responsibility for our choices and interpretations, making us miss crucial lessons, and perhaps even blaming Allah when things do not go as we had wanted. After all, we followed His signs, and now we are disappointed, so it must be His fault. And when we find ourselves in the same situation again, we may make the same mistakes because we never questioned the way we went about making our decisions in the first place.
So, how can we know? Is it even about knowing? And how can we make the right decisions?
On Knowing
It is natural to want a measure of security in our lives and in the important decisions we make. We don't want to make the mistake of pursuing something that may not be written for us, making our efforts seem to be a complete waste of time, perhaps suffering heartbreak in the process. We wouldn't necessarily mind putting in the work, even facing difficulties, if the end result was just guaranteed. We want a window into the unseen, or at least a hint of what it holds, and so we desperately seek certainty in the signs to calm our hearts.
The Prophet ﷺ received revelation from God. But even he was not told what would happen every step of the way, and he faced hardships and setbacks. In the Qur'an, Allah says,
'Say, “I have no power to benefit or harm(even) myself, except as Allah wills. And had I known the hidden realm, I would have acquired much good, and no harm would have touched me. I am only a warner and a herald of glad tidings to people who believe.”' (7:188)
When the Prophet ﷺ knew that he had to leave Makkah, the first place he sought protection in was Ta'if. He made the arduous journey there - over 90km by foot, after he had lost the two most beloved people to him - only to be met with contempt and aggression. We can assume that he made du'a to Allah beforehand. We know that his choice was deliberate, as Taif was inhabited by a powerful tribe. Yet, after all that effort, he was rejected in a brutal way. Indeed, the Prophet ﷺ considered it the most difficult thing that he went through.
Couldn't Allah have sent signs - or Jibreel himself - to tell the Prophet ﷺ not to bother beforehand? To tell him to wait for the Hajj season, when all the tribes would gather in Makkah anyway? Or to skip all these steps, and just command him to go to Madina?
We are in this life to strive, and how we strive not only impacts this life, but the next. Allah says,
"That no bearer of burden bears the burden of another; and that man attains only what he has striven for; and that surely his pursuit will eventually be seen" (53:38-40)
In reality, there is no way to know which path to take - if 'knowing' means the path that will grant us bliss according to our requirements - but we make our calculations and trust in God. What we do know, though, is that, no matter the outcome, there is a way for us to be with God. If harm afflicts us, then we are patient, and if good comes to us, then we are grateful. The former is not easy, and is not meant to be, yet we strive to focus on the lessons and we focus on the ultimate aim.
This does not mean that nothing matters, or that we are left to chance, or that there is no guidance. Our efforts do bear fruit and our supplications for what is best are answered, by the will of Allah. The struggle in the journey may actually be the answer - think of the Prophet Yusuf (as) being taken away from his family - or perhaps its purpose is to tell us about ourselves, and so we should pay attention.
On Interpreting
Allah's signs are all over. These general signs lead us to Him. As believers in God, we also look for the signs that are personal to us. Indeed, there are signs in both the material and spiritual worlds that we have to base our judgments on. Perhaps we look for spiritual signs that can tell us something beyond logic, and settle in the heart or, rather, we look for a facilitation of the means that assures us we are on the right path.Allah is the Lord of all of the signs, the material and the spiritual. He gave us mental faculties and spiritual ones - they are intertwined. We open our hearts by supplicating and praying istikhara, and we keep our eyes and minds open by considering the means that we have.
After the incident at Ta'if, the Prophet ﷺ saw the opportunity in the Hajj season, when all the tribes came to Makkah. Indeed, we can perhaps consider this a lesson that he learned after Ta'if. This way, the tribes would come to him, and they would have to respect the sanctity of the place and of the time. He would have full access to the tribes of Arabia.
One of the first tribes he spoke to was the tribe of Banu Shayban. He was with Abu Bakr (ra). Banu Shayban had treaties with the Persians. They were powerful and well-respected on both sides. The Prophet ﷺ gave them the message, and it appeared that they were convinced. But Muthanna bin al-Haritha, one of the three leaders, made an important caveat: they would only protect him from the Arabs, not the Persians. They did not want to lose the privilege of being allied with the greatest empire at the time, and the Prophet’s ﷺ message was not one that kings would accept.
It wasn't a perfect proposition, but it was certainly better than being left to the devices of Quraysh. Plus, after living amongst them, the Prophet ﷺ would be free to call them to the faith, so he could probably convince them, right? At the very least, it would buy the Muslims some time.
But the Prophet ﷺ declined graciously. While there were definitely positives, and it was surely better than being left with Quraysh, he looked at the practical considerations and the ultimate aim from this protection. As the saying goes, 'when people tell you who they are, believe them'. He knew that they were not the right people for the task ahead.
In hindsight, of course, we can say that the Prophet's ﷺ choice was the soundest decision, and it was meant for him to meet the youth of Madina - but he did not know it at the time. Either choice would have had its pros and cons. What is important here is that he did not wait to consult with Jibreel. In the Prophet's ﷺ wisdom, he recognized that, at that point at least, Banu Shayban valued something more than the truth - power and status. He did not let desperation guide him, nor did he solely focus on the good - their power, the fact that would offer them partial protection compared to the zero protection they had in Makkah - but looked at everything in total. So he put his trust in Allah, made his choice, and moved on.*
Each stage was a lesson. Ta'if was a no from their side, but there was a lesson. Banu Shayban were also a no, but from the Prophet's ﷺ side, and there was a reason. Sometimes we strive and the door is closed for us, and sometimes we have to make that choice. The Prophet ﷺ kept his heart and mind open, turned to Allah through hardship and ease, and made his decisions through asking Allah and taking everything into account. When one thing did not work, he did not question the outcome. He simply re-calibrated, and tried something else. So when we think of interpreting the signs, we can't simply be looking for hidden messages to avoid doing the work of truly considering what we see before us. We need to look at the practical and the spiritual. Indeed, the Prophet ﷺ spoke to 26 different tribes before meeting the youth of Madina. He made his decisions based on the ultimate aim, the values that were important for his mission, and faith. And all of that will count for him, just like our striving is counted for us.
On Difficulties and Lessons
It can get tiring; the uncertainty, the trying and the falling. Sometimes we take every mean, and still we are tested. But these trials are not meaningless. One of the righteous stated, “Verily, Allah compels his servant into a trial in the same way as caretakers do to their sick and their children. They say: Drink this, for in the end it will be good for you.” (Ḥilyat al-Awliyā’)
The scholar Ibn Rajab al-Hanbali said,
“I studied all of the verses and the ahadith where Allah mentions His ma’iyyah (His being with a person), and every single verse or hadith, where Allah mentions his being with a person, shows that that person has lost something... Allah never takes something away from you except that He gives you something in return. And the best thing Allah can give you when He takes something away from you is Himself.”
Indeed, the Prophet ﷺ was broken after Ta'if, despite making his decision based on what he knew at the time. How did he react? He turned to Allah through his pain, and not away from Him. He made the famous supplication that we know and can find comfort in. He expressed the sadness that was in his heart. He had to go through that to eventually get to Madina. And we learn from that and from him, since he is the best example. The Prophet ﷺ never said, "why did you not keep me away from this? Why did you let this happen to me?" He knew that this was a part of his struggle as a prophet, of being in this world, and it would not be in vain. And it was after the traumatic event at Ta'if that Allah granted him the miraculous night journey to Jerusalem and to the heavens, where the five obligatory prayers were revealed, where he prayed with the prophets, and his heart was assured. And eventually, he was given refuge in a place that was much better than what he had originally wanted. But that difficulty was part of the journey, if only just to teach us that there will be heartbreak on the way to relief, and that sometimes the wisdom is the hardship itself is that it is meant to turn us to Allah.
It is not easy. But elevation - spiritual, mental, emotional, even physical - can only happen through growing through what is difficult, and that pain is never in vain. Allah says in the Qur'an:
"...And never is your Lord forgetful" (19:64)
Allah does not forget - He does not forget the tears, He does not forget the supplications, the hopes, the dreams, the intentions; He does not forget the prayers in the night, the stress or the pain. The things you did, or did not do, for His sake alone are not a waste. Our supplications are responded to in many different ways, but the fact that they were deposited with Allah means that they will manifest in the way that is best for us, not simply on a material level here on earth, but at a metaphysical level in heavens. The Prophet ﷺ reminds us that, “Nothing afflicts a Muslim of hardship, nor illness, nor anxiety, nor sorrow, nor harm, nor distress, nor even the pricking of a thorn, but that Allah will expiate his sins by it.” (Bukhārī and Muslim) And anything that we lose when we strive in His way is never lost at all - Allah replaces with what is better in this life and the next.
On Trusting
We all know the famous hadith about trusting in God. A man said to the Prophet ﷺ, “O Messenger of Allah, should I tie my camel and trust in Allah, or should I leave her untied and trust in Allah?” The Prophet ﷺ said, “Tie her and trust in Allah.” (Tirmidhī)
Putting in the necessary effort is crucial, and so is learning the lessons along the way. The essence of trust is not simply believing that Allah will give us what we want, but knowing that whatever transpires at that moment is what is meant to be and can be good for us, in this life and the next, depending on how we react.
In the hadith of the Prophet ﷺ above, tying one's camel and trusting in Allah, in general, means that the camel will not run away. But it is possible that the camel could be taken in the night by a thief, even with the tying and the trust. This is where trust comes in. Will we feel resentful and turn away from Allah, or will we understand that He is the Most Wise and turn to Him? Acceptance and learning is true tawakkul.
Even if we cannot see the lesson immediately, we maintain trust in God's mercy and wisdom. Sometimes we are focused so much on that which we want or believe will give us ease, and Allah chooses to give us ease through something else that He has deemed is better for us. We might be focusing on what we believe is an end in and of itself, but Allah knows what we want or need through that request, and gives it to us in a better way. As Imam Al-Ghazali states,"As I look back on my life, I realize that every time I thought I was being rejected from something good; I was actually being redirected to something better. You must convince your heart that whatever Allah has decreed is most appropriate and most beneficial to you." And that is trust.
So how can we balance the striving and the trusting, the wanting and the acceptance?
1- Keep your eyes and heart open
We are not pure materialists nor do we wait for spiritual signs alone. A part of being believers in this world is putting in the practical effort and saying our prayers. And we need to know ourselves - what we incline towards - and how that might affect how we read things. We seek advice from those who can help us, and we prepare as best we can. That is all we are asked to do.
2- Make your move
Then we decide. Some things require us to go through the struggle to get to the end. Other obstacles might genuinely be insurmountable, telling us that this is not for us. Our role is not to try to speculate about the unseen, and whether something is meant for us or not in order to proceed. We persist when we see that a certain matter is best for us, and we let go when it becomes apparent to us that it is not.
3- Have trust
Sometimes the hardship is to teach us to turn to Allah in the different circumstances that we find ourselves in, and also to teach us about ourselves. Our shortcomings are revealed under pressure, and perhaps Allah shows them to us in order that we learn the lesson now to pave the way for something better in the future. And if things don't go the way that we had hoped, it is ok to be disappointed and sad. The Prophet ﷺ did not celebrate when he was rejected at Ta'if; rather, he expressed his pain to Allah. But he also accepted that this door closing was redirecting him to try another door that was better for him. And the essence of trust is knowing that what Allah has decreed is always better, and there is always purpose.
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*Al-Muthanna bin al-Haritha eventually became Muslim and was one of the people who helped defeat the Persian empire.